and the days

I will float away (a poem by my father in memory of my late mother)

mother

Family

You are not family

“You have to earn that”

You are just blood

Do you even know what it means to be family?

Do you know what family is?

A light shining in a house

bright and warm

a fire in the hearth

where home is

where mother father sister brother is

where you are

where I am

family

hugs denied

hugs forced upon us to our joy

the anger and sadness too

that is family

running into the night

no shoes on

promising to not look back

of course you look back

and stop

you backtrack

tears in your eyes running crashing down your face

shame

you are ashamed

you look around

you slump slouch

head down

you turn back

you return

family

it is what calls you home

mother father sister brother

gone away

but will come back

will be seen again

someday somehow

I try to write something substantial while I wait

I am not sure if I succeed.

Los Angeles

in the spring fog

i can feel the wind
it is gentle

not the roar of current
nor the gust’s whistle

i am accustomed to.

stray thought

thoughts and things

I am Harry Potter in a world without magic.

Quarantine Thoughts

happy in the skin I’m in

little girl I’ll keep running back to you let me hug you let me listen

This was me when I was 16 and basically anorexic … the plate at the front end of the table is mine… every dish is done and mine was untouched… I don’t think anyone realized… I don’t think I even realized at the time. I just didn’t eat claimed I was fasting for months until I forgot how to chew and my brother had to hand feed me yogurt
I’m unlucky as I’m bigboned
This was my starvation weight
And I was still called fat